


5 Times Cole was Stupid and 1 Time he Wasn’t

by Ultimately_Vibing



Category: Lego Ninjago
Genre: 5+1, Dumbass Cole, Fluffy, M/M, jay is moronsexual
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:06:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25230598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ultimately_Vibing/pseuds/Ultimately_Vibing
Summary: Cole is dumb. Luckily for him, Jay is exclusively moronsexual.
Relationships: Cole/Jay Walker
Comments: 16
Kudos: 111





	5 Times Cole was Stupid and 1 Time he Wasn’t

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is rushed and exists purely for my own vibes.

1.  
“Wait... sharks are fish?”  
Cole knew immediately that he shouldn’t have opened his mouth, based on the silence and everyone’s judgemental looks.  
“Never mind. Anyway-”  
“No! No, no. You can’t just move on from that.” Kai was grinning now, like he’d been waiting for this moment.  
“What did you think they were?” Jay’s hand was on his chin as he examined Cole.  
“Yknow. Sharks.”  
He could tell Jay was struggling to keep a straight face. Asshole.  
“You thought that sharks were an entirely separate category from fish.”  
“Yeah. Like... a mammal.” Hopefully that cleared his point up.  
“You thought they were mammals?” Kai was cackling now.  
“Are you certain you went to school?” Zane’s dry tone did nothing to help his slowly dying confidence.  
“Yes! Sorry I didn’t have a shark class?”  
Jay’s eyes were shining, and he pat Cole’s shoulder. “It’s okay man. It’s an understandable mistake.”  
“No it’s not!” Lloyd gestures wildly.  
“Maybe he was confusing them with whales.”  
“Whales are mammals? What the fuck?”  
More groans and table slamming (that part was from Kai), as Jay started to explain to him, voice soft.

2.  
”Why wouldn’t we just go through the lake?”  
The team looked at him.  
“Because we don’t have a boat.” Lloyd said it slowly.  
“But we could swim.”  
“It is literally filled with piranhas.”  
Cole snorts. “Who’d you hear that from? Piranhas aren’t real Nya.”  
Silence.  
“You’re not great with fish are you? First the shark thing and now this?” Kai tutted. “Maybe we should get you an fish encyclopaedia.”  
“No, no, hold on.” Jay quieted everyone. “Let’s hear him out.”  
“Well, it just doesn’t sound realistic, that’s all. Fish that bite you? They made that up for movies and stuff.”  
Jay nodded. “I completely get you. There’s some fucked up stuff out there.”  
“What? Jay? You cannot be serious! Don’t encourage him.” Lloyd pinches his brow. “Can we just - we’re not swimming. Even if we only get bitten a few times, that’s still a minor injury, and we need to be in the best form possible. Alright? Now as I was saying...”  
Cole made eye contact with Jay, who beamed at him. At least he was nice about this kind of thing.

3.  
“Yeah, yeah. Okay, I get it, ha ha I’m stupid, but I know I’m right about this!”  
“You’re really, really not.”  
“Shut up Kai. Jay! Come here.”  
Cole hollered at his best friend, desperate to be right.  
The blue ninja approached, patting Cole’s shoulder.  
“What’s got your back up, man?”  
“Kai is trying to tell me that all the continents were originally all joined together. But that clearly doesn’t make any sense, because how the fuck would they move? Right?”  
The split second of hesitation was all Cole needed to know he was indeed wrong.  
“I mean... yknow. I guess not everyone knows about the tectonic plates and stuff. I’m sure you’re not the only one.”  
“I know about the plates! I just didn’t realise they moved.”  
Jay nods. “Oh yeah. Convection currents and stuff. It’s not really that important. Not like they’re gonna move much in our lifetime.”  
Cole sighs, before glaring at Kai. “One day I’ll know something you don’t. Bet.”  
“I will give you a hundred bucks the day that happens.”

4.  
“Plankton? Like... the dude from Spongebob?”  
Jay’s eyes glittered. “Well... kind of?”  
“He’s not real Jay.”  
A discussion about some fishes’ dietary habits was suddenly derailed.  
“He’s not talking about that Plankton. He’s talking about the actual organism.” Kai sighed loudly. “I am genuinely buying you a book about marine life because I cannot handle one more stupid sentence from your mouth.”  
“You know, the little microscopic creatures that live in the ocean?” Jay started searching it up on his phone, showing Cole the results.  
“Woah. They’re like... actual things?”  
“Yeah. I think they’re kinda cool. Imagine being so small that some things can’t even see you.”  
“That’s ridiculous. We can see everything. Even if we need a microscope, we can still see it. Just zoomed in a bit.”  
“You know what a microscope is?” Lloyd chimes in, and Cole has no option but to roll his eyes.  
“Haha. Hilarious. Peak of comedy.”  
“I mean, we can’t see all the colours.”  
“Uh, Jay, what are you talking about? I think you’re mixing up humans and dogs.”  
“No, no! I’m serious. It’s a little complicated, but some species have better eyes than us, which means they see more colours. That wall there?” Jay pointed at it. “Sure, it looks kind of blue, but some creature with cool eyes might view it as something we literally have no concept of.”  
“Huh... Like how we know dark matter exists but not what it is?”  
“You remember that?” Jay’s cheeks pinked a little.  
“Yeah! I remember all the stuff you tell me.”  
Jay’s small smile at his words meant the world.

5.  
Cole was really deliberating whether or not he should ask.  
On one hand, he might be right.  
On the other, he couldn’t handle being called out for being stupid for the millionth.  
Hmm. Jay was here. Maybe he’d mediate.  
“I have a question.”  
“Oh god.” Nya’s groan stung a little, and Kai looked like his day had been made.  
“You just said that Atlantis isn’t real. But-”  
“Oh my god please stop talking.” Lloyd rested his head in his hands.  
“Let me finish! You don’t have any proof of that, so can you really be sure?”  
Nya drummed the table with her fingers. “Okay. Where do I even begin? First of all, ocean exploration has come so far since that myth, meaning we have had the ability to look for it, which of course means people have searched. The whole ocean. And there is no evidence that such a city ever existed. On top of that, even if we did find a sunken city, that would just be because of rising water levels, and all citizens of that city would be dead, or would have migrated. Not continuing to live underwater.”  
Cole frowned. Okay. Maybe that had been stupid. Especially because of that solid reasoning.  
“Wait a second though.”  
Oh! Jay was here to relieve him from his squirming.  
“You’re seriously agreeing with him? C’mon Jay, you’re smarter than that.” Kai shook his head.  
“If Atlantis were to exist, then surely they’d hide themselves from us. Humans are exploitative and they’d know that. Underwater caves and stuff exist, some of which can’t be explored by our current technology. Fuck man, there’s so many bits of our oceans that haven’t been explored. I don’t think you can just dismiss that.”  
Nya tuts. “You’re just covering for him.”  
“No! You have no actual proof that it doesn’t exist.”  
“You have no proof that it does.”  
“You can’t just deny the possibility!”  
It’s when Jay’s got come backs to every single thing that Nya says that Cole realises.  
He’s worked something out. And if Kai doesn’t know, then he’s about to be 100 bucks richer.

+1  
“I’m gonna ask Jay out.”  
Kai choked on his drink. “Why?”  
“Because I want to. And he’ll say yes.” Cole turns to leave, but Kai grabs him.  
“Listen, I know you’re a fucking idiot, but you’ve never made an assumption as fucked as that. As much I’d love to watch you be humiliated, I’m not gonna let you ruin your friendship.”  
“Okay, I hear you, but also, Jay has a crush on me.”  
“No? He doesn’t? I’m pretty sure Jay’s too smart for you. Hate to break it to you.”  
“So what you’re saying is I know something you don’t?”  
“No! This is something you very clearly do not know!”  
“Sure, I’m stupid, but I’m not oblivious. Now let go of me, I need to go talk to Jay.”  
Kai lets go. “Don’t come crying to me afterwards.”  
“Prepare that bet money because I’m gonna take it from you.”  
Kai snorts. “Have fun ruining your best friendships.”

Cole tries not to let that get to him. He’s sure Jay is attracted to him. Like, 100%.  
But he’d also been sure of the shark thing. And he piranhas. And every other little stupid thing he’d done or said.  
Nevermind. Abort mission.  
Except he was already outside Jay’s door, and he’d already knocked and, oh god, there he was, face brightening when he saw Cole standing there.  
It’s fine. He’s right. He knows this.  
“Need something?”  
“Uh, I have a question for you.”  
Jay smiles wider at that, leaning against the door frame. “Been called out for something silly again?”  
“No. No, I’m pretty sure I’m right this time.”  
“Hit me.”  
“You want to date me, right?”  
Jay’s eyes widened, and he stepped back a little, now bright red.  
“Uh...”  
“Because I’m interested. And maybe we could get coffee or something?”  
“Oh! Now?” Jay’s flustering was cute.  
“I’ve got time. So I’m right?”  
“You’re right.” Jay looks so surprised and it makes Cole feel proud of himself. Who’s dumb now, huh Kai?  
“Let me just... Oh! Wow! You’re sure? me??”  
“Yes Jay.” Cole squeezed his hands. “You. Not too dumb for you, am I? That’s what Kai thinks.”  
“You’re not dumb. Just -”  
“Yeah I am. Pretty stupid. I know that.”  
“I, uh, have a thing for himbos.” Jay blushed.  
“That explains it.” Cole kisses Jay’s cheek. “We’ll leave in ten minutes?”  
Jay is stunned into silence for a few seconds.  
“Yeah. Sounds great.”

“Kai?”  
“I told you not to come crying to me.”  
“I need that hundred. Got a date to pay for.”  
Kai’s sputtering makes Cole’s day, almost as much as Jay’s giddy response to being asked out.  
He’s not too idiotic. Not all the time.


End file.
